Hope in My Heart

This is a little belated - so it may have lost some of the enthusiasm initially experienced, but the sentiment is still the same. Thursday night I watched the Democratic debates between Hillary and Obama at the University of Texas. I couldn't get tickets to attend the actual debate, but this was even better because I was able to watch it, live, from the comfort of my own home office chair while also working on Walter's scarf. Thus, I was able to experience my two favorite things at the same time - politics and knitting! It felt so perfect, and not only because of the knitting. This was the first debate I actually watched -- catching only the gist of all the others on NPR the following mornings, then awaiting the results of the state primaries from the same source or a news web page. But this one, being held in my home town, at the beginning of the primary in my home state, and therefore, my turn to show up at the state primary and make my voice heard, and not to mention, being the historic event that this whole election is, I came straight home from work and sat down to watch - resolving not to get up, not to answer the phone, not to even talk to my boyfriend until it was done. And that, dear friends, is exactly what I did. I was so moved by the whole experience - not just by what they were saying, those wild, radical, liberal ideas coming out of their mouths that I was emphatically nodding my head in agreement with, but in the commercial breaks in between, by the moments I took to pause and fantasize about what it would be like to have either of those two leading the country, serving as role models for millions of Americans like myself. In Hillary, we would find a strong and powerful leader - a female role model performing the most challenging and scrutinized role in American society. A woman president of the U.S. - can you imagine it? What kind of changes would this have on our society -- on our society's view of women and their place in the world, the man-woman debate, even on popular culture? On a personal level, I think that having a woman for president, any woman, would, to some degree, legitimize my own experience as a woman in the workplace. I think for the first time ever, I wouldn't feel like I was struggling alone - out there fighting on a front line that only women could see, hear or feel. Even when I've worked where there was a group of us - men and women working together for the same cause - it has always felt like a small group, and one that had to be absolutely perfect, flawless, fierce, and unfaltering, not letting our guard down for even a split-second lest the vagaries breach the stronghold. I think if a woman were elected president, even if just as an honorary position, like our current commander-in-chief, I can only imagine that this underlying feeling would change one-hundred fold, instantly, and overnight. I can also only imagine that it will be a similar experience for African Americans, as well as other minorities (such as women!) if Barack is elected president.

And race and gender issues aside, the candidates themselves present figures of character, intelligence and substance. Both appear sincerely compassionate about the state of our nation, human affairs (both locally and globally), the health of American citizens, to name a few of the issues they have been so heatedly arguing lately. So, with not only one but two candidates so closely representing the characteristics I want to see in our next Commander-in-Chief, how does a working girl like me decide where to cast her vote? Well, the decision has not been an easy one, but after much deliberation, rumination, discussion, and research, I have decided to cast my vote with hope.

While I have no doubt that Hillary is a mover and a shaker, and I am impressed with the goals of her health plan as well as the action items she provides for achieving those goals, in my heart I believe that America is long overdue for a changing of the guard. This is still a young century, times have changed, the world is changing and changing rapidly. A host of new and unforseeable challenges lie just up ahead and we need a leader with innovation, fresh ideas, unorthodox solutions. We need a leader who inspires hope in Americans, both old and young, and at least a blossoming curiosity with the rest of the world.